acceptance

i hv two biggest duniawi fears in my life, currently.

one of them, i do not want to be like her 
her..her her 


 but it is evident how i similarise her as i grow up
i can see i talk like she talks
i instruct...like she instructs
and i always give in ..because i hate fighting for the same thing
i really do, i hate scrambling for an object others are interested in, just like her

everytime i ask my friends how they see me in 10 years to come,
words coming out are always...career - busy - success - wealth
no. no. no.
i do not want to be ..just that :-(
i don't want to enjoy that one side of the world...
i know i can. i really do, i know i am capable of being better than that
but i do not wish to spend my time doing that thing she does...up until now

but i know that i am her
she is in me..
how can i ever deny myself..?
when i am created to be like that..?
how can i ever resist this fate...if everyone is so sure how i'll be in 10 years to come
they know me better than i know myself..isnt it?
i do not know who i am and who
i will be