Monday, June 29, 2015

"Where's the "good" in "goodbye"?
Where's the "nice" in "nice try"?
Where's the "us" in "trust" gone?
Where's the "soul" in "soldier on"?
Now I'm the "low" in "lonely"'
Cause I don't own you only
I can take this mistake
But I can't take the ache from heartbreak
No, I can't take the ache from heartbreak"

""I can remember singing this along while wiping out my tears in the middle of the crowd. God I have to get rid all of The Script's songs from my playlist. But then, running away from you will need a lot more effort. I need to revamp my whole freaking life, my room, my closet, my books and everything. Literally everything that i own in my life. Thats how hard you'll find yourself trying to forget a part of yourself. But how can I not try to forget when pain had been engulfing my soul for too long now. How can I not try to be happy when tears had been too flooding my soul nowadays. I at least owe myself a chance to make it up of all the time I wasted on you. But honestly I thought we had the second shot. That we can repair everything that We've lost. I thought we can be saved. I believed in that. I honestly do. But seeing you today make me doubt all of our decisions. We've changed and drifted too far to be pulled back. Even gravity can't make it a success. We have to try, right? Or shall we just let fate decide this time. Because the last time I sit back and do nothing, I regretted all of my decisions and doings. I cant do that again. But I just cant summon up enough strength to keep on fighting this battle. It is true that a forbidden and complicated love is really, one hell of a fight especially when you're alone and you cant even tell anyone. It's wrong to tell. It just...shows who you really are. Now I'm  hoping on You to save me again. Again and again..just because now, i am a weak girl. No longer the so said to be strong girl. I lied when I said I was stronger. I lied. I just decided to live in lies for weeks just to feel that satisfaction. I did. Now, reality kick in bijes. ""

-manira 2012

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